What I want to be

I read this quote the other day and ever since it hasn't left my mind. 

It's one of those quotes that I want to inspire and motivate me. 

There is so much I want to be in life, but lots of those things I fail at. 

I go to bed most nights thinking I failed because I didn't do so in so 

or because I acted a certain way towards my husbands and children. 

I'm tired of letting my head hit the pillow and being disappointed in how I've been.

Now, I'm not saying I shouldn't give myself grace. 

I know I can't be perfect, even if I want to. 

I know I'm going to fail. I know I'm going to mess up. 

I'm trying to be okay with that, but being okay with that doesn't mean I can't be better. 

So, who do I want to be? What do I want to be? 

There's a list, of course. 

I want to be kinder to my husband and children. 

I want to have a better relationship with Christ. 

I want to be organized in many areas. 

I'm sure there is more, but I don't want to overwhelm you or myself ;) 

These are the things I want in my heart, but I can't just snap my fingers

and have them be true in my life (oh, how easy that would make things). 

I have to do things in order to be who I want to be. 

When it comes to my husband and kids... 

I have to watch my tongue (I am NOT good at that).

I have the breathe and pray a whole lot!
I have to make a lot of effort because sometimes its tough! 

When it comes to my relationship with Christ...

I have to make the time, which again, I am not very good at. 

But if I want to know Him, if I want to have a strong relationship with Him,

If I want Him to be ever present in my life, then that is what I have to do! 

I have to read His word, pray, and go to church. 

I have to have a relationship with him like I do with others who are important to me. 

I so badly want to be organized. 

I want to have a clean home, a cleaning schedule, a schedule in general and on and on.
This does not come naturally to me even though I desperately wish it did!
I need to work on it... make myself make lists, schedules, clean every day and not just let things pile up.

There's so much I want to be, but the only way to be is by doing.
I'm not going to just get anywhere sitting on my tush! =)

I know we all have things we want to be, things we want to change. 

It takes motivation, time and a lot of work. 

But I can be who I want to be if I take steps to be so, 

but more importantly if I go to Him and ask for His help. 

That's the real way to change from the inside out!

That's what I really want, my heart to be different!