They aren't too bad, right?
I know some of you are probably like, "No! I consider that really clean!"
The truth is our home is pretty clean a lot of the time,
but that's because I have a problem with cleaning.
If you came to my house any day of the week,
you'd more than likely see me cleaning A LOT.
I honestly feel like a maid most of the time (I know...what mom doesn't?)
because that is how much I am cleaning.
It's pretty non-stop, everyday of the week.
I like a clean home. Maybe a little too much.
My husband's actually told me to chill out on the cleaning.
To just rest. To just be with the kids.
I've been thinking about it a lot this week,
you know as I clean as much as I can.
For me, I think it's more about just having a clean home.
A clean home is great, I feel a lot less stressed after it's nice and clean.
What it really comes down to though?
I care way too freaking much about what people think.
When people come into my home I don't want it to be a mess.
I'm scared their home is cleaner than ours.
I'm scared their going to think we are slobs.
I'm scared they are going to wonder what I do all day
(ya know besides take care of three, three and under).
More so I'm scared they are going to say something and make me cry.
Yes, I'm that sensitive about it.
This is definitely another childhood insecurity that followed me to my now.
Growing up our home wasn't always the cleanest
and I'm totally not making any judgements because I GET it,
but it's had an affect on me.
Especially because I've heard family members comment on it.
Or even say things to me about needing to vacuum under the stove
(do people even do that???).
Tomorrow I'm throwing my sister a wedding shower
and because of that I've busted my butt cleaning from top to bottom.
It's not perfect though and I'm trying to let go of the idea of the perfectly clean home.
I think I'll sweep and mop the always dirty and sticky floor.
Maybe wipe down the countertops and the kids toilet seat AGAIN.
But I think I'll leave the toys and laundry.
I will always try to not care tomorrow when someone comments
because I know it will happen!
Trying to care a bit less about what others think when it comes to this
and so much because really, what mama has time for that? Not this one!