Wednesday, October 2, 2013

31 days {why I struggle to enjoy}

Yesterday I wrote my first post for the 31 days link up.
So, if you're wondering what's going on, you may want to start there.

My main goal in writing about motherhood is to find ways to enjoy my children more.
In saying that it's probably a safe assumption that I don't enjoy my children.
That isn't the whole truth, but it is somewhat close to the truth.
I want to be honest and open in my struggles with being a mother.
So today I'm going to share why at times often it is hard for me enjoy being a mother.

What it really comes down to is I am sinful.
I am selfish and want what I want.
My kids, they are the same.
They are selfish and want what they want.
That's part of being human.
That is the bigger picture of the battle I face everyday.

I can break it down further than that.
I'm not very good at slowing down and just being.
I have a to-do list, I have distractions, I have things I want to be doing.
I'm awful at putting away my cell phone,
shutting down the computer, and turning off the tv.
I'm not the best at sitting on the floor and playing with my children.
I'm not the best at stopping whatever I may be doing and just being with my kids.

Often I feel like there is something more important I need to be doing.
I should be cleaning constantly because is the house ever really clean?
I should be writing a blog post, reading a blog, or responding to an email.
I should be doing this and that...on and on it could go.
(Oh, and did I mention the disobeying, crying, fussing, fighting....
sometimes makes it hard)?
The truth though, is that those things they don't really matter,
not in the bigger scheme of things.
What matters is my children.
After all my husband and I did decide I'd stay home to be with the kids!
We didn't decide I'd stay home to take care of just the cleaning.
We didn't decide I'd stay home to be on the internet or watch tv.
I'm home to take care of my children. They are what matter most.
Their hearts matter. Their minds matter. Their spirits matter.
Those are the things I want to pay attention to, those are the parts of them I want to enjoy.

I believe this post explains better why I chose my topic.
Writing about enjoying motherhood will involve so many things mentioned in this post.
It will also involve much more than that, so I hope you'll stick around for a while!

Are you a mom? Are these any of your struggles? Do you have different ones?
Share your heart with me, I want to hear it!

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