Having a newborn

Picture taken by Songbird Photography

Having a baby the second time around is so different than the first. 

I remember being terrified of not only having Braden, but bringing him home.

I was scared I wasn't going to know how to provide for him. 

I was afraid he was going to get hurt or stop breathing in his sleep. 

I asked, "is this normal?" a lot. I called his doctor often. 

This time, with Maeva, it is so different. 

I wasn't scared of having her or bringing her home.

I knew that I was capable of taking care of her.

I wasn't afraid she was going to get hurt.

I know a bit more of what is normal.

Its still hard though. That's the one that isn't any different. 

My days are so full. Much more full than when it was just Braden and I at home. 

My days are full of feedings, diaper changes, and a baby in my arms. 

The days are full of a toddler pulling on my hand because...

He wants me to come with him and give him my attention, of him talking and talking. 

I thought it was hard to get anything done before, but now, it seems nearly impossible! 

Then, its hard because of other things...

I forgot about the newborn cry and how hard it can be to handle sometimes.

I forgot that sometimes no matter what you do... they still cry... 

It breaks my heart to hear sweet Maeva cry and to not be able to figure out why. 

I forgot how much sleep you lose, but I know I'm getting less now because now I have two. 

Yet, even though its tough and tiring, I wouldn't change it for the world.

I am so blessed that God has given me two babies to take care of.

I know He's there with me every step of the way, helping me through motherhood.