When I wake to nurse a sleeping baby, I feel it.
When I rise to get ready for the day and through the day, I feel it.
The mom guilt. The worry.
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The nagging questions, "Am I failing my kids? Am I messing them up?"
Am I failing them because we stay home more often than not during the week?
Am I failing them as I slap together another peanut butter and jelly sandwich?
Am I failing them because they play a lot by themselves and together?
Am I failing them because I spend too much time on my phone,
cleaning, blogging, or other things?
Am I failing them because we don't go to church?
Am I failing them because we don't do crafts or projects every day?
Am I failing because they watch too much tv?
Am I failing them because the iPad is used far too much?
Am I failing them because I may not send them to school?
Am I failing because I may home school them?
Am I failing them because I yell far too often?
Am I failing them because sometimes spankings come from anger?
The wondering and worries go on and on.
It makes my stomach hurt when I think about it to often,
which is pretty much multiple times a day, every day.
I know some changes need to happen in this house and I'm trying.
As I try to make changes, as I try to better I whisper many prayers.
God, help me not to worry. Help me to put my trust in You.
I know that You have my kids in the palm of your hand
and that you have a future for them.
I know that all things will work out for good.
I know know that you love them far more than me.
Help my heart to know and believe in this God.
That's all I can do. Pray and try and let the rest be covered by His grace.
So thankful His grace covers it all. All of my worry. All of my doubt.
Do you struggle with worry and mom guilt? What helps you?
I hope that if you do you find comfort in this.
In knowing that He's got the future taken care of.
Mine, yours, your kids and whoever, whatever you may worry about.
His grace was there, is there, and always will be.
Oh man I struggle with mom guilt so badly! The only things that help take it away is seeing my son happy and my husband telling me that I'm doing a great job. It's just too easy to fall into the trap of thinking every other mom is doing a better job, when the other moms are going through the same thing. I feel guilty that we don't go to church every Sunday, we are doing better but it's tough to get one child ready and out the door, I can't imagine it with three!
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