His cries. I wake, knowing that it is me that he needs. I gather him in my arms and pull him close, nursing him. Its not something I'd ever given much thought to it, before coming a mother, nursing that is (that is if I would or wouldn't when I became a mother). But I am in awe of it because not only did I give him literal life, but every day I give him life by giving him nourishment from my body. Its truly an amazing thing.
He nurses for a while and I just stare at him in amazement. This boy, he used to be inside me, he used to be so tiny. At this moment, however, he doesn't seem to be so little anymore. He, I am sure, has tripled in size, he smiles, he makes much noise, he digs through a bin of toys, and he has so much hair on top of his little head! He is my baby boy, but just by stealing glances at him, I know that even though he will always be my boy, he won't be my little boy for long.
He finishes eating and starts to drift to sleep. I think about putting him back in his crib, like I normally do, but this morning I don't want to. I hold him close for a while...knowing how special these moments are. I know I won't always be able to hold him like this. I know he won't always be this small. So, I snuggle close, wrapping my arms around him, and I savor this. I lay him down between his daddy and me and just stare at this beautiful family we have. I want to capture this moment in my heart forever.
So, I grab my camera and snap a few pictures and I urge myself to remember this exact moment because one day, in the too close future, this will only be a memory I have to hold onto.